BG Newsletter   -   Volume I      March 1998

The Rant - Men and Women Bait-n-Switch vs. WYSIWYG

What is the old Bait and Switch? It's when you offer something that is enticing and attractive then switch it for something of lesser quality. Basically, bait them with something good and then switch it with something, well, not so good.

What is WYSIWYG? It stands for What You See Is What You Get. Pretty simple right?

Well, when you apply this to men and women, it's not that simple. In the on-going dance between men and women, we're often faced with the challenges brought on by Bait-n-Switch (BS) and WYSIWYG.

In the real world when a man and woman first meet, obviously they are going to put their best foot forward. No normal person shows up in grungy, old sweats and acts like a raving lunatic. We try to look our best and act like the wonderful people we are not. Then if the initial encounter goes well, we move on into the first stages of a relationship. Here the BS continues. The woman makes a concerted effort maintain her perfect appearance, hair, makeup, clothes. The man is extremely attentive, calling regularly, making plans in advance, etc. Then once you've got them hooked, the old switcheroo happens. The woman may not try nearly as hard to look her best and of course the man gets to experience "morning face". They become less the Independant Woman they were when they first met the man. The man on the other hand becomes less attentive and soon starts wanting more space, more "guy" time. He doesn't put in as much effort as he did when he was doing "the chase". Bait 'em, hook 'em, then switch. That's a pretty general rule of the relationship jungle.

Now here's what I'd like to see...WYSIWYG men and women. Where what you see in the first few hours of meeting someone is pretty much what you get. Basically what I'm always ranting about, HONESTY. How about truth in advertising? I'm not saying to always walk around unkempt or acting like a jerk. I'm just saying be yourself as much as you can. Yes, of course show your best qualities and make a good impression. But always remember, sooner or later, that person is going to see the "real" you. Why not make it sooner and save both of you time. I'd rather someone see me for who and what I am now, and decide I am not what they are looking for then to have them think I'm the bomb now and later on down the road, say "Hmm, you're not what I thought you were." Sure it takes time to get to know someone really, really well. That's obvious. But I believe you should be able to get a pretty good feel for what a person is all about in a relatively short period of time.

I strive to be a WYSIWYG woman. Hey, look at my Live Webcam. Decidedly unglamorous. Decidedly uninteresting. But hey, it's me. What you see is what you get.

Date From Hell

We went to a sushi restaurant, one of those where you pick the plate as they float by in a boat. He sat next to me and seemed quite intent on pumping me up with sake. I wasn’t planning to drink at first but he ordered a large sake and insisted I drink with him. From the beginning of the evening he started mentioning how his ex-girlfriend had been really naïve and conservative. As the night went on and he consumed more sake (all the while still encouraging me to drink more). He continued to mention his ex-girlfriend, who by the second bottle of sake was now in retrospect, way too conservative and not passionate enough. By the end of the evening he had started rubbing my shoulder and was telling me that his ex was frigid and sexually repressed. I deduced that his ex was probably not sexually repressed at all, she just didn’t want to do HIM, because by this time I knew I sure as hell didn’t. Cluelessness mixed with drunkenness is a great prophylactic, remember that. So that was my date from hell.

If you want to share your Date From Hell story, send all entries to DFH@baddgrrl.com. All names will be changed to protect the losers. I mean the innocent.

They Shouldn't be Allowed to Breed

My friends and I went out for a late night snack one night. The waitress that took our order was not, in my opinion, the brightest bulb on the tree if you know what I mean. She took about 10 minutes to take our order. We ordered 4 items. 3 items came within 15 minutes. Then about 20 minutes later, she came back and said, "Hello? Sorry, no more fries." We all looked at her speechless. We had all finished our food by then and were just waiting for those fries. When she walked away we just sat there amazed at her cluelessness. I've had fries from this place before, they are definitely not fresh cut, they're frozen. In 35 minutes I could have run up to Safeway, bought a potato, peeled it, cut it and fried that sucker up myself. It took her 35 minute to figure out that they were out? Hello, McFly?! Bag empty=No Fries. Geez. For this reason, my friends and I have unanimously given the Fry Chick at ABC Bakery my "They Shouldn't be Allowed to Breed Award".

Please send your nominations for the "They Shouldn't be Allowed to Breed Award" to BreedNo!@baddgrrl.com

Lorraine Trivia

My first Job...  My first job was delivering the San Francisco Examiner. I shared a paper route with my buddy Lisa Q. We used to ride our skateboards around while pulling the newspaper cart.   Quite a feat now that I think about it.

My first Color TV...   We didn't buy a color TV until I was a Senior in High School. No I'm not that old, we just never felt the need for one. It wasn't until a couple years ago I was watching an old Star Trek (the original) and shouted "Oh my God!" and my friends said, "What? What?!" and I replied, "They have different colored uniforms!" I had always thought they just had uniforms in various shades of gray. My friends laughed at me/with me? I laughed too. What a trip.

My first New Car...  My first car was an '89 Red Acura Integra LS. I loved that car. Especially the moon roof. I now drive a '92 Red Integra LS. My next car will probably be another Acura or Honda. Well, unless I get the Boxster of course.

My first Boyfriend... I met my first boyfriend when I was 24. Yes, that's right, believe it or not. I was what they call, a "late bloomer". See the Evolution of a BaddGrrl for clarification.  If you don't believe me ask Lisa Q. She's known me since the second grade.

The Latest and Greatest

I now have my own domain so my new URL is www.baddgrrl.com

I've installed Webcam at my desk at work. You can now see me live at my desk from
9am-7pm Monday-Friday PST. Narcissistic? Sure. Exhibitionistic? Of course. Why'd I do it? Because I CAN!

I've set up an Instant Messaging program on my Website so people can "page" me through the internet. It's faster than E-mail and very simple to use.

I'm working on revamping my Home Page to cut down on the download time.

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